Most people would think that Christmas in Iceland is a white fairytale with Northern lights and fluffy, snow-capped mountains. I am here to prove you wrong: back in the old days, the thirteen days before Christmas was used to scare the hell out of kids with the Icelandic Yule Lads. However, this tradition of totally freaking children out was banned, and the Christmas trolls have become more kid-friendly, they are still coming down from their mountain on the 12th of December, to put either candy in well-behaved or rotten potatoes in naughty children’s shoes, and play mischiefs on you for two weeks. If you are cautious enough, you will have a chance to see them projected somewhere in Reykjavík, committing their petty crimes. The Yule Lads live in a cave in the Dimmuborgir lava fields with their mother Grýla, their father Leppalúði and with the big black Yule Cat. Grýla, the Christmas Ogress has the ability to detect misbehaving children and hunts for them during Christmas time, as her favourite dish is NAUGHTY KID STEW. 12th December You should be careful about your sheep, because Stekkjarstaur would be more than willing to suckle the milk form the yews, if he could use his knees to kneel (which he cannot). 13th December Keep an eye on your cow’s milk, Giljagaur likes his latte with only milk foam. 14th December This should be the day when you hide your pans in the kitchen, as Stúfur loves to steal the crust from the meal you prepared for your late-night binge watching session. 15th December You like licking the spoon when baking? Þvörusleikir likes licking spoons even more. Put those spoons away if you don’t want them touched by sticky troll fingers. 16th December Pottaskefill will gladly make your day easier by stealing and cleaning your messy pots with his filthy troll tongue. Thanks Pottaskefill for sparing me the minutes I would have spent with putting the dishes in the dishwasher. 17th December Wow man, these guys really like licking stuff. If you had an idea of putting your wooden bowls under your bed on the 17th, don’t do it, if you don’t want Askasleikir to take care about cleaning them up. 18th December It’s dark and it’s cold outside and you are curled up in your bed readying yourself to take that long-wanted, well-earned good night’s sleep. This is the moment when Hurðaskellir comes to keep you up all night with slamming doors. Bummer, you should have gone partying after all. 19th December We have already phrased a lovesong about our undying love for Skyr. On the 19th of December, everyone should keep their precious skyrs within reach in case Skyrgámur comes to take it away. No, you won’t Yule Lad, there are things that you can mess with, skyr is not one of them. 20th December Skyr is not enough, on the 20th of December, Bjúgnakrækir arrives to rob you of your sausages. Damn, if you are not careful, you will end up with no food on Christmas day. 21st December Gluggagægir is one creepy little guy, probably the first one to come up with the idea of reality shows, as he is one for familiarizing himself with your intimate private life by peeking through your window. I would draw those curtains, if I were you. 22nd December You will easily recognise Gáttaþefur as his nose arrives before the rest of his body. It is a perfect tool for him to sniff out cakes and bread. He will not be satisfied with the smell only, and would do anything to have a taste. 23rd December If you are one of the meat-lovers, you should keep away your precious treasure from around the fireplace, because on the 23rd, one thing will come down from the chimney and it’s not Santa Clause. It’s Ketkrókur with his meat hook to fish your dinner away. 24th December This is the day of Kertasníkir, who creeps after children to eat their candles. Seriously, what is wrong with this guy? Icelandic Christmas traditions also made me change my mind about one more thing: I always thought that Dobby is the only one who can be genuinely happy with a pair of socks as a Christmas present. Not in Iceland. Here, a pair of socks is a loving symbol of caring about someone not being eaten by a giant cat. Yes, if you do not receive a piece of clothing for the holidays, the Jólakötturinn comes and eats you for dinner. Merry Christmas. Now you know what to be careful about until Christmas day (basically everything, you’d better just reserve Christmas shopping to the last days in case someone comes and steals and licks your kitchen dry) (and make sure you buy a pair of socks for your loved ones), it’s time for us to get you more into festive mood with our Icelandic Christmas countdown. Ready, steady, countdown!